Public porn, that's all it is.
it's not very good porn - a group of friends and i decided to watch it for shiggles and we struggled - especially given the recent stuff about abuse coming out about abuse in hollywood it was weird watching coded abuse through the film and be glorified as exciting and sexy and fantastic - it's not even close to a sexy relationship (not to mention the sex involved is incredibly vanilla and boring anyway - not sure what these 50+ women are getting out of it given that there's no male nudity either...)
like it's actually horrific watching it play out - it really rang true of an abusive relationship that a friend of mine is stuck in and the manipulation, possessiveness, obsession and danger the film portrays as sexy and fantastical just rang so many alarm bells for a few of us - the film bordered on upsetting tbh
this isnt me having a go at BDSM or bondage or any of that because that can be a perfectly healthy fetish if that's what both partners are into but throughout the first film christian grey tests anastasia's boundaries and overrides her consent at various points, he allows her no space, no relationships that arent okayed by him, no freedom - he is possessive, obssessive, jealous and doesnt show her any respect or mutual benefit - and the film's response to this is that it's all fine because even though she doesnt like it, he's really sexy and rich so everything he does that's wrong and unhealthy and dangerous is fine...
the tone is all wrong because the way christian grey is written he should be tonally depicted as some sort of almost-serial killer who you're not quite sure about, it should be portrayed from anastasia's point of view and it should be about how she's dealing with his obsessions and manipulations and gaslighting of her and how she tries to escape that toxic abusive relationship
but no it's just mummy porn... with a pretty good soundtrack
maybe it's just me
this from a psychologist:
"Christian Grey was terribly neglected. He is confused about love because he never experienced the real thing. In his mind, love is tangled up with bad feelings like pain and embarrassment. Christian enjoys hurting women in bizarre ways. Anastasia is an immature girl who falls for Christian's looks and wealth, and foolishly goes along with his desires.
In the real world, this story would end badly, with Christian in jail, and Ana in a shelter — or morgue. Or Christian would continue beating Ana, and she'd stay and suffer. Either way, their lives would most definitely not be a fairy tale."
"The movie is actually about a sick, dangerous relationship filled with physical and emotional abuse."
sorry for this mini-essay - i just genuinely dont understand the hype around this film/book series - because to me the characters/plotting/relationships in this series are outrageously destructive, unhealthy and abusive yet they are held up and glorified...